More on Experimentation

As I mentioned in my previous post, I intend to conduct a highly scientific study into pre-run nutrition, specifically examining the impact of proteins, fats, sodium, and carbohydrates (meat, barbecue sauce, and beer). While the findings of this study will be important, one of course cannot use just one set of data to draw a conclusion. Which is why I conducted a related study on pre-run nutrition, specifically examining the impacts of day old dairy, this evening. I ate a slice of yesterday's pizza, straight out of the fridge, and then hit the treadmill.

Not only did I find this fueling method facilitated running endurance, but I was so energized and motivated at the conclusion of my five miler that I also spent time completing my assigned PT stretch and strength exercises. What's more, these findings are at odds with my initial experiment, whose results indicated that such epic pre-run feasts lead to near pants-shitting. This can only mean one thing: we need a larger sample. I must continue with my planned analysis of pre-run fuel on Saturday evening over barbecue.

People have called me a great many things over the years. Those who know me have alternately referenced:

- that I'm "such a dude"

- that I live "the bachelor life"

- that I embody "frat house ethics"

But what everyone has failed to recognize is that I am also a pioneering nutritional scientist. You can thank me when you start getting mozzarella sticks instead of Gu at the next race aid station.

Until my next experiment,

Dr. 3:59:59. Bitches.